Midnight (Mimetic Response 5)

A vast open [[sea]] was before me, and up top, the [[midnight]] [[moon]] looked down at me.

[[I]] was [[floating]] amidst the (text-style:"buoy")[ocean], and that is all I wanted to do. Nothing more was required at this [[magical]] point in life.

They said that only (text-style:"shadow")[fools and [[dreamers->Life]] ]wandered around at this time. Well, I was exhausted of holding onto what people thought of me. It was time I explored [[myself]].

I don’t know what magic is, anymore. At least not with how people think of it nowadays, with cleverly played tricks to [[deceive->Deceive]] the mind. Isn’t magic just a //spicy zest// of [[life->Life]]? .... What? Do you think I’m [[foolish->midnight]]?

I was both cross and calm with myself. Cross because I was angry at myself, at who I had become. I didn’t want to have anything to do with me anymore! At the same time, [[somewhere->Enough]] in the [[distance->doubts]], I was tired of my me vs. me internal fight. I just wanted it to be quiet, so I let it be.

If only life, real life, could be as easy as this. But since we are in a [[fantasy->twinkle]], why not keep it low and [[easy->I]]... at least for [[now->Now]]?

[[Stars->twinkle]] and sea kist were my companions, unless I counted (text-style:"blur")[[[myself->myself]]] too.

Nothing could be closer than the truth, the truth of my existence. Permeating my sub-conscious like a (text-style:"blur")[muffled blanket] over my face. It’s so good to exist, but sometimes this fact [[stresses->floating]] out my soul, because, am I living up to my [[purpose->Enough]]?

Glimmer, [[shimmer->Deceive]], simmer… Twinkle, twinkle, little star. Am I that (text-style:"smear")[[star]]?

Ahhh.... I breathed in the fresh salty air. What a way to open my mind and my senses. Life, with these precious and fleeting moments, is really (text-style:"fade-in-out")[[[beautiful->Enough]]].

Well, that’s enough serious thinking for now. Let me [[live->Start]] a little!

Hey, don’t get [[prideful->Life]] up there! Or [[wait-->Enough]]... was I just trying to see some(text-style:"fade-in-out")[ self-worth] in me?

(text-style:"expand")[Who am I] ? I don’t really know. All the people around me, well, I’ve tried so hard to please them and make them happy. I didn’t want to be a burden to them because I’m a people-pleaser; I could never say no to anything. But in that process, I forgot to please myself. And now I’m here to escape the [[burden->doubts]] that this has been on ''me'', by roaming around like a (text-style:"strike")[psycho] (or should I say (text-style:"fidget")[freebird?]) on the moonlit ocean.

I very much like to sit and ponder my [[existence->Now]] and the wonder of human life. I could sit here, on this boat, looking out towards the water and all the reflections of life and living things around me, for ages. They don’t call me an old soul for nothing. Will you peer into my (text-style:"wavy-strike")[heart], or will you judge me like the rest?

I’m not here to trick you into some sort of [[philosophical->Life]] questionings, boring unending, (text-style:"shudder")[thoughts and whinings] here (although I do do that very much). I know how annoying that can be, I’m sorry. Do //you// want to talk to [[me->I]] about anything?